By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: Bruce Willis, game to movie, Kane & Lynch
Kane & Lynch. Arguably the most important game of 2007, all because of one little review on GameSpot. The game featured a good story, some nice characters, and some nice action. Unfortunately, they forgot the gameplay. I was happy when they announced an upcoming movie; finally, the story without playing through the game!? Awesome!
Even more awesome? They just announced yesterday that Bruce Willis is going to be in the movie as Kane, the mercenary main character. Of course, I would argue that he’d be better as Lynch (especially seeing some of his “crazy” scenes in 12 Monkeys), but movies just don’t go wrong when Bruce Willis is involved. Even his awful movies are good!
By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: aliens, Dr. Jones, George Lucas, Harrison Ford, Indiana Jones, Maya, mumble mumble scowl grumble mumble, old, Steven Spielberg
In my life I have met two people who have never seen an Indiana Jones movie; not surprisingly, they live together and are best friends. Despite that odd occurrence, I would bet money (not real, obviously) that you’ve seen at least one of the Indy movies, if not all four of them. The original trilogy remains a classic, and contains some of cinema’s most memorable scenes.
With the release of the new Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, things just wouldn’t make sense if we didn’t have tie-ins galore. LEGO Indiana Jones, Harrison Ford’s face plastered on any buyable item you can imagine (from French fries to socks), and of course, a new, updated collection to allow people to catch up on everyone’s favorite archeologist.
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By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: Blair Witch, burning hobos, Cloverfield, hand camera, monster movie
Cloverfield surprised critics when it opened to a tremendous box office, taking in nearly $50 million; it surprised them once again when the film’s gross dropped 68% in its second week.
The hand-cam “Blair Witch meets Godzilla” picture is a unique one, that’s for sure. Numerous people complained of the shakiness and feeling nauseous in theaters, a reason several of my friends had for refusing to see the movie. Now that it’s viewable on the tiny screen, will people who passed it over in theaters give it another shot?
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By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: Daniel Day-Lewis, Daniel Plainview, milkshakes, Oscar, taking things that bring boys to the yard, There Will be Blood
There Will Be Blood was one of the more surprising movies of last year. What initially struck me as a boring, pointless film thats only saving grace was Daniel Day-Lewis playing a character he already played later turned into one of my favorite movies. It’s something you need to watch more than once to appreciate, as all of the magnificence of the movie comes in the form of all the little, unheralded aspects.
The movie tells the tale of an oil man named Daniel Plainview in early 20th century America as he thirsts for more money and power, received in the form of controlling oil. There are many characters in the film who are important to the work as a whole, but the entire movie is very clearly placed in the (obviously) capable hands of Daniel Day-Lewis.
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By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: barber, Johnny Depp, murder, musical, Sascha Cohen, Soylent Green is people!, Sweeney Todd
If I told you years ago that one of my favorite movies of 2007 would be a musical, I probably wouldn’t even believe myself. If I told you that musical would be a slasher film directed by Tim Burton and starring Johnny Depp, I definitely wouldn’t believe myself. Oddly enough, that very scenario happened with Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street.
The film-adapted from the Steven Sondheim play-tells the story of a London barber, wrongfully accused of a fake crime by a corrupt judge out only to steal his beautiful wife. The barber (obviously Depp) spends years in prison, finally escaping and returning to London on a sailing vessel to take his revenge on the judge (Alan Rickman) who ruined his life. He learns upon arrival that the judge essentially killed his wife and stole his daughter to raise as his own, so he’ll have hell to pay when Sweeney Todd catches him.
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By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: Disney, Enchanted, gaydar test, musical
Every now and then I’ll see a chick flick that I’ll admit isn’t totally terrible; you know, you can watch it and it’s okay, but you won’t want to watch it again anytime soon. Enchanted is one of those movies.
While it’s not the greatest movie I’ve seen (or even remotely in any Top X lists I’d make for this year), for a chick flick it’s solid enough. The movie tells the tale of Giselle, a stereotypical Disney soon-to-be-princess looking for her prince charming. While singing and cleaning with animals (and making a lifesize figure of her beloved yet-to-be-met Prince Edward), Giselle is attacked by a troll. Edward comes to the rescue, the two meet, and instantly decide to wed the next day.
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By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: ball suckingly good, Cartman, comedy, Imaginationland, South Park
At the end of South Park season 11, viewers were watching in suspense as an epic trilogy unfolded-that trilogy was Imaginationland. Starting off with Cartman and Kyle’s bet involving Kyle gently sucking on Cartman’s pubicle sack and culminating in a battle worth of Two Towers, it’s just as awesome as it was months ago.
The “feature” (it’s called a feature, but it’s blatantly obvious it’s still three episodes) begins with Cartman betting Kyle that leprachauns do exist, and if they do, Kyle has to finally suck Cartman’s balls. Against all odds, the boys spy a leprachaun, who warns them of an ominous terrorist attack. The next day at school a strangely dressed man approaches the boys, and tells them to come with him on his balloon to Imaginationland. It seems the leprachaun was right, as Imaginationland is quickly attacked by terrorists. The US government works to stop the terrorists, while Cartman works at getting Kyle to honor his ball-sucking bet. The two stories intertwine, and thus the epic trilogy is born.
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By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: Brendon, Enchanted, Filmplosion, Sweeney Todd, There Will be Blood
Things have been a little slow here lately, so I just wanted to let people know that I HAVEN’T abandoned FP. Things at GamerNode were just extremely busy, as were a few real life projects I had going on. I have some plans (including a contest or two) planned for the near future, as well as a more extensive overhaul of the sight in the coming weeks/months.
So stick around–I ain’t dead yet. I’ll be looking to expand more to features and reviews rather than news commentary, so that will take some time. In the meantime, in the next few days you can look forward to DVD reviews for Enchanted, Sweeney Todd, and There Will Be Blood.
By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: Boondock Saints, please let it happen, sequel, Troy Duffy
Good news for anyone who has similar tastes to me: Troy Duffy has revealed that a sequel to the awesomely awesome Boondock Saints will begin filming this summer! Tagged with the suffice “All Saints Day,” was greenlit by Sony, and supposedly will offer the once-promising filmmaker a much larger budget to paint his picture.
Of course, anyone who’s seen the documentary Overnight, which chronicles Duffy’s journey in making Saints as well as his meltdown due to it, will likely remain apprehensive. Will Duffy pull through and finally give us a sequel to one of the greatest cult hits of all time? He already toyed with our hearts once in 2002, but I have a feeling that this time he’ll pull through.
(I hope.)
By Brendon Lindsey
Tags: Academy Awards, Anton Chigurh, book to film adaptation, Coen brothers, Cormac McCarthy, DVD review, No Country for Old Men, Oscar winner, overrated, Tommy Lee Jones
If you watch movies or ever talk to people who do, chances are at some point or another someone you know has mentioned No Country for Old Men as one of their favorite movies from last year. The Best Picture winning movie certainly had a head of steam leading up to the Oscars, in no small part due to the fact the Coen Brothers are responsible for it.
The film is about a man who happens to find a suitcase with $2 million in cash at a scene where a drug deal has gone wrong. Like most people in that situation, the man (Llewelyn Moss) takes it. Finding one of them still alive, Moss leaves him for dead and heads home, until his conscience gets the best of him, forcing him to return to the scene to bring water to the dying man. Unfortunately, doing this alerts the surviving dealers of his existence, and the fact he has their money.
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