Natalie Portman will “never marry,” but Star Wars fanboys are still crying alone
According to Uberazzi, actress Natalie Portman, who became every geek’s dream girl after she let the insanely dorky and much younger Anakin Skywalker take her to his room to show her his model robot, is making a statement against the current institute of marriage by… Well, by not getting married.
“I’m into monogamy. But I’m not really into marriage. I sort of hate the legal aspect of it. What does the state have to do with it,” Portman said. “Why are they making rules that say my lover can stay in the United States if they’re foreign or share my health care benefits because I’m straight - but if you’re gay, you can’t have that?”
In the meantime, lonely Star Wars fans will be forced to brainstorm how they can get Portman to meet them and change her mind (because they’re so awesome like that), and Natalie will continue to passively protest an issue that really isn’t that important, rather than do something productive or try to make a difference in the world by acting out with her affluence and prestige.
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